Ride or die chick a chick that ain’t afraid to be down with her man she’ll do anything her man needs her to do.
Example: “We was fighting in the store and my girl was a ride or die chick.”
Are you a ride or die chick? Will you hold your man down no matter the cost? Before you answer that question, read this post.
loyalty the quality of being loyal to someone or something.
“Her loyalty to her husband of 34 years”
By now, you’re probably wondering, “Why in the world is she defining words or phrases?” Right? The reason I wanted to lead this post with those phrases/words followed by the definition, is because I want you to understand fully what they mean before we get into this.
A few weeks ago, I was so frustrated by a Facebook post one of my “Facebook Friends” posted that I had to post a Facebook rant. Now, I usually keep my rants to myself and laugh at the Facebook foolery but this one post irked my nerves. It was about some girl talking about how her “boo” was locked down (imprisoned) and how she was loyal to him and she love him and “free boo boo.” For those of you who are not educated in “hood terms” “Free_insert name here_” is a term used when a friend or loved one is in prison for a crime they are usually guilty of committing.
Now, hood education to the side. The reason this post irked my nerves is not because she wanted to free her boo, I have seen too many of those post to let that irk me. It was because she labeled herself as a “ride or die chick.” Why is that a bad thing you ask? The reason that irks me is because chicks use this term as a reason to stay stuck on stupid. Yes, I said it, STUCK ON STUPID!
I have seen too many post on social media sites or heard this phrase too many times referring to foolery. Chicks are using this as a means to stay oppressed by some dude that usually has other women, usually referred to as “Side chicks” waiting for him or by his side. I have seen too many women, young and old, use this terms to prove their loyalty to their men and to me it’s a cop-out.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I truly understand and agree with standing by your man. Keyword, “your.” I have a husband and we have been together for many years and we stand by each other through the good and the bad. Keep in mind; we took vows before God to do so. We did that because we love each other and we wanted to make that commitment under God.
Even thought I’m married, I am by no means stupid. I will not ride for a man who is not committed to just me. I will not ride for him if he is involved in anything illegal, jeopardizing himself, our family and me. Hell no, I won’t ride for him if he wants me to be involved in his illegal activities and HELL-NAW I won’t ride for him if he asks me to “hold something” for him. I’m not into hide you from the po-po (police) or anything else that falls under prison time. You see, the way my life is set up, I’m destined for something that calls for me to stand above foolishness and I don’t have time to do prison runs. Sorry boo boo.
Yes, I will have your back if we are struggling together but working towards greater. Yes, I will help you provide for our family and yes; I will motivate and push you to be the man God has called you to be.
The reason this post is close to my heart is not because we have women hiding behind the guise of loyalty to be stupid for men who often times don’t’ know the true meaning of commitment, but, because of the young girls who see this type of behavior and think its okay. They use these women as examples of how women should conduct themselves and how men should love women.
This type of thinking or behavior is churning out a generation of girls who think its okay to hold their boo’s guns or drugs for him. It’s okay to jeopardize your future in the name of love and to take a charge to keep your boo from going to jail. It’s okay to accept whatever some no-good man throws your way all in the name of love. You know why? Because she saw her mama’s, auntie, cousins, sister do it. She thinks that having hood credibility for being a down chick (ride or die) will set her apart from other girls, granting her a lifetime of love and loyalty. She is surprised to learn that in fact, this path will only offer her a lifetime of trouble and heartache.
We have to do better. We have to show better. We have a whole generation of girls watching us. They are watching us to see what a real woman is. They are watching us to see what real love is. Are you going to be the example of what to do or a statistic?
I’ve often been told that I’m a “square” for my way of thinking. A “square” is someone who likes to follow the rules and usually lives within the guidelines of the law. You know what I have to say to that? “Thank you lord for making me a sturdy, solid square instead of a wayward, no direction having circle.” What does a circle do? Roll, anyway the wind blows it. What does a square do? Stay solid, planted firmly in its spot and stable. I’d rather be known as that stable solid chick as opposed to being the crazy chick that has no direction and doesn’t know whether she’s coming or going.
God put us here to make an impact. What impact is you making by being so and so’s ride or die chick? What impact are you making by being loyal to someone who doesn’t even see your worth and will probably never make you his wife?
Be the odd “square” out of the bunch. Show the younger generation what real women are about. Go after your goals and dreams and be the inspiration the younger generation looks to as an example of how to step into your destiny. Your destiny is not to be a “ride or die chick” but to be a virtuous woman. If you don’t know what that entails, look it up.
After reading this, are you still a “ride or die chick?” Are you a circle or a square? Tell us what you think about this post and on which side of the road do you stand and why?
Be bold, be great, be EMPOWERED!
If you know a little girl between the ages of 10-17 in or around the Nashville, TN area that could use some positive role models, contact us and tell us all about her.